Ellen Lynn Rathbun
January 24, 1961 ~ July 3, 2024
Resided in:
Portland, Maine
Portland - Ellen Lynn Rathbun passed away on July 3 after a defiant 10-month battle with pancreatic cancer, surrounded by her immediate family. Born on January 24, 1961, Ellen was raised in Granville, New York, on her beloved Hatch Hill, a bucolic family farm surrounded by farmlands and sugar hills. Even when she was deep in the throes of her illness, she managed to return home to spend time and find solace. Ellen was the third of five children and was predeceased by her father, William Rathbun; her mother, Nancy O’Donnell; and her two older brothers, Mike and Mark Rathbun. She is survived by her younger brothers, Matthew and Richard Rathbun; her son, Christopher (Tophe) Thorne; and her daughter, Lillian (Plum) Thorne.
Ellen grew up in a rural environment near the New York/Vermont border and spoke fondly of her childhood, reminiscing about riding her horse, Velvet, to visit her best friend Mary on a neighboring farm. After high school, Ellen attended Endicott College in Beverly, Massachusetts, where she met Dwight Thorne, her future husband, who was sitting in front of her in the bleachers at a Boston Red Sox game. Ellen graduated from Endicott College and moved to Portland, Maine, to attend the University of Southern Maine (USM) School of Nursing. She and Dwight married on July 3, 1982, precisely 42 years before her passing. Following her graduation from USM, Ellen started a life-long career at Maine Medical Center’s Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU), where she experienced the emotional highs and lows associated with the miracles and tragedies of caring for newborns and their families.
While working in the NICU, Ellen developed friendships that endured for the rest of her life. The sisterhood of the NICU nurses was always a source of love, guidance, and friendship for Ellen. She considered some dearest friends as “big sisters” and leaned on them for support throughout her life - especially during these past few months. She found immense joy in outings with her “girls,” whether that was enjoying margaritas together or going on biking treks in Vermont.
Ellen had many passions and was never shy about expressing her views or beliefs. Ellen was a lifelong member of the Maine Organic Farmers and Gardeners Association (MOFGA) and the Portland Food Co-op and was growing and buying organic food long before it became mainstream. She was a vocal advocate of all things natural - food, medicine, gardening, clothing, and lifestyle. In recent years, Ellen found solitude and tranquility while traveling in her camper van - aptly named Nobra - throughout the Northeast. She had hoped to trek across the country and visit national parks in her retirement.
Anyone who ever met Ellen knows that her greatest passion was being a mother. The pride and joy she experienced and shared regarding her beloved Tophe and Plum were boundless. She wore the title of “mother” with a profound sense of duty and commitment. Once she grasped the reality of raising adopted kids of color in this world, Ellen became a fierce anti-racist and worked to educate herself - and anyone who would listen - about the challenges and inequity facing her children and all marginalized communities.
In her final months, Ellen reflected on what her obituary would look like. She characterized her life as one of conflict and controversy, but always dedicated to leaving the world better than she found it. She fought hard for all her beliefs and influenced and motivated many, many people to always do the right thing and live presently. Ellen can now rest.
Ellen’s final months were made more comfortable by Dr. Wrona of New England Cancer Specialists, Angel McLellan of Moby Botanicals, and the wonderful people at Hospice of Southern Maine and the Gosnell House, especially Nurse Kelly, who supported Ellen’s determined efforts to sustain her active lifestyle and retain control to the very end.
A celebration of Ellen’s life will be held in late summer or early fall.
Ellen suggested that anyone wanting to honor her life and memory should contribute to
Presente! Maine, a Portland non-profit working to empower displaced Afro/Indigenous and Latinx peoples of Maine at www.presentemaine.org/give
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We neighbors and friends for years. Both of us nurses at MMC, raising kids and living in the country. She was a strong advocate for herself, her kids and her patients.
Glad we spent time together last fall and stayed in touch through this challenging time she was going through.
She never lost her strength and determination despite the toll it took on her body.
She experienced life her way to the very end.
We admire you and will miss you friend 💔
I admire the love Ellen had for her children. I admire how she guided them to help them understand who they are. I had my baby Stella before baby Lilly entered Ellen’s life. Being a fierce advocate for her children to have the most healthy nutrition, Ellen asked me to share my milk with her baby. I was able to share with them and have plenty milk for my own baby. Later on when Lilly was about 6 she came to work with Ellen. Ellen introduced me as one of the milk mommies. She told Lilly that there are adopted mommies, belly mommies and milk mommies. Lilly had the sweetest look on her face as she listened to her mom. I will always remember that she let Lilly know who I was. Ellen was ahead of the times, I so admire her for that.
I met Ellen in Baxter Woods with her dog, Bella. Over the years, we walked together and became friends. Later, we partnered at bootcamp until the COVID lockdown changed our routines. Ellen was very supportive when I was caretaking for my husband, which I will always appreciate. Her advice about gardening and removing invasive plants helped motivate me to continue what seemed like a hopeless battle. Ellen faced her cancer diagnosis with bravery, making the hardest decisions with dignity. I will miss her dearly.
Ellen, we will miss seeing you walk your dogs in the neighborhood, having chats on the street and discussing your beautiful gardens. With sympathy to your children and family.
Dawn and Alan Gray.
So sorry to hear of Ellen’s passing . We were work friend and had many conversations over the years . We often were not aligned in our beliefs but we respected each of our opinions . She loved her family and spoke often of them. I admired her spirit , dedication to her babies and living life her way !
I admired Ellen as an NICU nurse at Maine Medical Center. She was a “caregiver” nurse who always advocated for her patients, comforted the parents, and made sure we all did our very best. It was a privilege to have worked with her. For Ellen every day was Earth Day. She was a passionate caregiver for Mother Earth.
Ellen, my gosh Soooo many memories
I wish I had taken more pictures
Our hiking trips, biking in NY and Vermont. The Sap house, your Mom’s garden.
The night we partied in The Old Port with Hillary and Ann!
The best time EVER. My God we laughed
My bike accident with you when you said Posy, please hold your chin together, hahah
Your gardening advise, our Kids!! Both trying to figure out how to be a mother, taking comfort in that we were doing the best we knew how, scary times for sure.
You and I sitting in the oncologist’s office in Boston when you came to the decision not to proceed with the treatment that was going to do you in anyway. You were so brave
Thank you for letting me share that with you Ellen
I have not doubt you are part of the wind, the sea, the trees and in the purest joy.
I’ll see you on the other side.
Posy
Its all about the data
Enjoyed spending 3 summers as a travel nurse at MMC. Ellen was one of many nurses I spent time with. Ellen was passionate about life! See ya later, my friend!
OMG. El and I had so many memories. 40 years of them actually. So many to mention but the one we laughed so much about. We were working in the Nicu in a twin room. She had one and I had the other. I had such a hard time holding my bladder. I was busy and couldn’t get to the bathroom. I pulled the curtain so no one in the hall could see me. I sat on the trash can and peed. Ellen looked over and I waved at her. We LAUGHED SO HARD❤️ We talked about that so many times. Great times❤️❤️
I’m so sad Tofe and lily I worked along side your mum. She was a great advocate for the babies.
Ellen and I cared for many babies together in the NICU. We became mothers at similar times. We shared a love northern New England. We had many conversations about life, medicine and nursing, nature, and raising children. She was a fierce advocate for so many.
Sorry to hear this!! Thinking of all of her family!!
Hike, bike, spend time in NOBRA.
Have her sweets!! She lived chocolate pudding and chocolate chip cookies
Her beautiful children Tophe and Plum.
She always spoke her truth!! Lot of times it was against the popular grain but you always knew exactly where she stood. I respected her bravery to do that
We had a great hike doing part of the presidentials. I enjoyed our talks and a few margaritas, especially the night at the great lost bear. She always want to camp at the common ground fair and I am so glad I got to share that experience with her last fall
Ellen and I became friend while working in NICU.
Whatever!!!!!
Her Fight!!!!!
Beautiful tribute. Sending my love to all of you.
What a beautiful tribute Sending my love and condolences to your whole family. I will miss her dearly.
Ellen would talk about her kids all the time. How one time Lilly had boys over and she knew bc the toilet seat was up. Showed us video of Lilly at college doing a rally and having a strong voice. She was proud. And how tophe is vegetarian. And when he was a toddler he bit into a tick that was full -🤮blood all over. Ellen would share her passion for a cleaner planet constantly at work. Putting fear into co workers for using plastic and not throwing their stuff in recycling. She’d go through the trash to ensure we all got the message and how important it was to do our part. She was an amazing woman who NO ONE could ever call lazy or boring. She was very smart and a great laugh when she was at “tea time” (before last care times around 4pm.) there are certainly many conversations I will NEVER forget that I had with Ellen. I truly admire her tenacity and ability to claim mistakes. She did speak of her childghood and how much she loved her mother and the farm. She shared so many stories with great detail…so much you could picture yourself there. She will be truly missed. So sad. So soon. My heart goes out to the family. She raved about her love for you
Ellen was with my husband and I and our son Alex in May 1990 he was in NICU for 6 days and she was with us every step of the way he died on 5/4/1990 and she was the most wonderful nurse person ever and over a year later our daughter was born at MMC and she came to visit us she will forever being in my heart she was an angel to my husband and I during this very difficult time
I met Ellen in Junior High School. We had fun and made many memories; all happy. A gal with four brothers had to be tough!
Thanks for being YOU!
Hugs to Tophe & Lilly (Plum).
Mary C
I’m so saddened to hear of Ellen’s passing. I worked with her in the NICU and was honored to be a milk donor when she first became a mother. She was an amazing nurse and human being. She brightened the lives of so many. My condolences to her family.
No words for your loss – Ellen sure kept you on your toes – fear of god in me when i first started at MMC but soon realized her never ending caring and love for her work and family was all it was not me. Any cause she believed in she took the bull by the horns and pursued – such as she was as a nurse at the bedside being an advocate for her babies. Ellen you have left a huge hole down here that will never be filled – thanks you for being who you – the world needs more angels like you ❤️
My wife is Mary mentioned in Ellen’s obituary, they were childhood friends growing into young women and being maid of honors in each other’s wedding